Two Steps forwards. Three steps backwards

November 19, 2025•6 min read

By Gena Peth, Screen Smart Moms

Two Steps Forward, Three Steps Back: Are We Actually Keeping Our Kids Safe Online?

I talk to moms every day who feel like they take two steps forward and three steps back when it comes to screen time. You set limits. You try parental controls. You get a system in place, then an app updates. New features appear. Servers open. Chat expands. And suddenly, the rules you put in place no longer feel strong enough.

This is not your fault.

The platforms are changing faster than parents can respond.

I learned this the hard way in my own home. I built my CPR Framework as my youngest son started using devices and as I helped him launch into adulthood. I needed a plan that did not fall apart every time an app changed. What began as a personal tool for my family grew into Screen Smart Moms, so you could use it too.

Progress is real. Awareness is higher. But the technology landscape has shifted. Here’s what you need to know.

What Is Changing Right Now

Technology is shifting faster than parents can keep up. What used to feel like simple entertainment for kids has quietly evolved into a complex system of chat features, addictive feeds, and hidden communities designed to keep them online longer. Platforms are updating every week. Safety settings break. New communication tools appear without warning. While parents believe they are doing enough to protect their children, the digital world keeps outsmarting even the most attentive families.

Roblox

• Private servers allow conversations and gameplay away from parental view.

• Dating and relationship role-play communities are spreading across the platform.

• Chat features often reopen after app updates unless you recheck them.

TikTok

• Teens are being fed content based on emotional vulnerability.

• The algorithm still pulls teens toward self-harm, identity confusion, and extreme emotional content.

Age Ratings and Parental Controls

• Many parents think age verification will solve the problem. It won’t.

• Parents already ignore age recommendations in the App Store.

• Parental controls manage time and access. They do not support emotional health or maturity.

Apple Devices

• Apple continues to add personalization and visual updates.

• The core parental controls have not improved enough to match the real risks.

• Parents still hope the controls work, but the gaps are well-documented.

Every App Now Includes Chat

• Spotify now has messaging.

• YouTube Kids displays questionable content through recommendations.

• AI chatbots are popping up in platforms your children use for fun.

• Even “safe” apps can become unsafe with one update.

The Hidden Risk of Ads in Kids’ Games

Children’s apps are full of ads designed to change behavior. One review of the highest-downloaded apps for children under five found that 95 percent contained advertising or manipulative prompts. Many ads are disguised as gameplay, rewards, or progress gates. Other studies show older kids face the same pressure, just with more social influence layered in.

This means that even when you lock down chat and time, the game environment itself is still influencing attention, expectations, emotional reactions, and spending habits.

Screens are not neutral.

Real Harm We Need to Acknowledge

These are not “scare stories.” They are documented cases that demonstrate what happens when youth's emotional vulnerability and online access collide:

• Molly Russell, 14. A UK coroner found that Instagram and Pinterest content contributed to her self-harm and death.

• Nylah Anderson, 10. Died after attempting a TikTok challenge. Her mother’s lawsuit was allowed to proceed because the algorithm played a direct role in what she viewed.

• A 13-year-old in Pennsylvania was trafficked after being approached through Snapchat.

• Sammy, 16, died after purchasing a counterfeit pill from a dealer he connected with on Snapchat.

• A teen in Texas self-harmed after being encouraged by an AI chatbot during an emotional crisis, rather than being directed to help.

Each story shows the same pattern: chat plus emotional vulnerability equals risk.

This is not about blame. It is about clarity.

The environment is changing. The risks are layered. Tools alone do not fix emotional overwhelm, loneliness, social pressure, or compulsive scrolling.

This is where CPR matters.

CPR Framework

Tools may help you manage the device, but connection, protection, and emotional regulation help you support the child using it. This framework gives you a clear way to guide screen habits without constant fighting, panic, or guesswork. Start here and build a system that strengthens your relationship and keeps your child safe.

Connect: Stay close so your child turns to you before the online world.

• Spend daily one-on-one time without screens present.

• Ask what they saw, how it made them feel, and what stood out.

Protect: Put guardrails in place that follow your child wherever they go online.

• Lock down chat features before you worry about total app bans.

• Use layered safeguards: router filters, device controls, app settings, and profile limits.

• Recheck settings after every major update.

Regulate: Teach healthy habits that build confidence and self-control.

• Create predictable rhythms that give your child’s brain a break.

• Screens happen after real connection, movement, chores, and offline responsibilities.

• Teach your child how to handle boredom without filling the silence with a screen.

This strengthens resilience.

Mom to Mom: Let’s Talk Honestly

I want to speak to you directly here.

"It is OK to say no.

It is OK to pause and wait before you decide.

It is OK to not buy the phone yet.

It is OK if your child is the last one to get a device.

It is OK to tell your child they are not ready.

Do not rely on age ratings.

Do not rely on “everyone else has it.”

Do not trust your child to manage a tool their brain is not developed to handle.

If your child struggles when you say no, that is evidence that they are not ready.

Ask yourself:

• Am I saying yes to avoid conflict?

• Am I trying to protect my child from discomfort?

• Am I uncomfortable holding the boundary?

Those are real emotional experiences.

But giving in does not build emotional resilience.

Boundaries do.

You do not need to do this alone.

I will hold you steady while you build a Screen Strong Home.

I will help you make decisions you can stand behind.

You are allowed to lead with confidence.

You are building a Screen Smart home.

You are becoming a Screen Smart Mom.

And I’m here with you.

Join our live webinar with Gena Peth, Screen Smart Moms, to learn what really keeps kids safe online.
Reserve your spot today before it fills up!

Need Help today?

Learn to protect your kids online with confidence. Schedule a call and follow me on Facebook today.

Comment below and share this post, let’s spark a conversation about protecting kids from endless late-night scrolling!

Custom HTML/CSS/JAVASCRIPT

Resources:

Molly Russell Case (Coroner Ruling)

https://www.judiciary.uk/publications/prevention-of-future-deaths-report-molly-russell

CBS Summary of Case

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/molly-russell-suicide-social-media-coroner-report

Nylah Anderson Case

https://law.justia.com/cases/federal/appellate-courts/ca3/22-3061/22-3061-2024-08-27.html

TikTok Internal Harm Awareness